An Open Letter to Seekers

Isn’t it mind-blowing how many people pay for reality, connection, and actuality—however don’t present up when it’s proper in entrance of us?

We purchase a web-based course and do 20 p.c of it.
We purchase books and skim a 3rd of them.
We join occasions we by no means attend.
We comply with “gurus,” or pedestal prophets, hoping to get a glimpse at their human existence or hear one thing we already know however are too afraid to confess.
Look, I get it.
So many people are trying to find one thing we really feel is lacking or damaged, pondering we received’t be glad and entire till we discover it.
We battle to really feel content material it doesn’t matter what we’re doing, who we’re with, or what we’ve achieved. So we pay for one thing, hoping and praying it would join us to some “absolute reality.”
Seekers—I see you.
You’re not misplaced.
You’re positively not alone.
You’re not damaged, or empty, or flawed.
You simply are.
You’re wanting.
And that’s okay.
Actually, for years I used to be in the identical place. I seemed in each crevasse of the human expertise to search out some common reality in my existence.
It was the traditional existential disaster: Why am I right here? Who am I?
There’s one common reality I’ve discovered via all of this, and I want I might inform each seeker on the planet:
We’ll by no means discover solutions to those questions if we don’t give the whole lot we’ve obtained.
I don’t imply this in some motivational “rah-rah” manner. Extra within the “we have to leap in toes first and learn to swim” form of manner.
Play full-out.
Purchase the net course and do the entire rattling factor—not as a result of we paid $97 for it, however as a result of it might actually maintain the important thing to our enlightenment.
And maybe that sounds dramatic, however give it some thought:
What if the solutions we have now been in search of have been in one of many numerous books we began however by no means completed?
Or on the opposite finish of that teaching name we dedicated to, however didn’t present up for?
Or within the yoga class we paid $25 for, however determined to sleep via as a substitute?
The worst factor we will do as a seeker is to sign-up for the whole lot and present up for nothing.
I do know this as a result of my life didn’t change till I did.
I spent a whole week unsubscribing from e mail lists I didn’t open, freely giving books I knew I had no real interest in studying, and deleted programs I knew I’d by no means end.
All the unread, unfinished, uncommitted issues had a price—a weight that was holding me again from seeing my precise reality.

Each unfinished course, unread ebook, and half-assed remedy session appeared to push me additional and additional away from my capacity to search out solutions.
It grew to become more and more clear to me that the issue wasn’t the packages or the books—the issue was my (lack of) dedication to discovering solutions.

So from one seeker to a different, listed here are three issues I discovered after wandering for years.

1. The 4 Life-Altering Phrases.
“Perception clings and religion permits.” ~ Alan Watts
These 4 phrases can change our lives. Our brains are meaning-making machines. They’re sample recognition execs, which always look to know and make which means out of issues which regularly can’t be absolutely understood.
Therein resides the issue.
The difficult side of perception is that typically there isn’t a proof. Generally we have now no actual proof that we should always consider. Due to this, typically it appears unattainable to take action and sends us on a journey for solutions we might by no means discover.
Our job isn’t to always search out proof to consider one thing will occur the best way we would like. Our job is to have action-based religion. What I imply by “action-based religion” is that this:
We have to take motion in the best course (or no less than the course we really feel we should always go) and have religion that no matter is supposed to occur will occur. We have to discover the place our thoughts is in search of proof to consider and shift by asking ourselves, “What motion might I take to have extra religion?”
Religion just isn’t blind; it helps us see what our minds can’t, however solely after we’ve taken motion that enables religion to be current.
2. Cease Saying Sure to Sh*t That’s a No.
“No: It’s an entire sentence.”
However how? How do we all know what to say no to? Easy—if we aren’t going to finish one thing, press ctrl + delete.
Unsubscribe from the e-mail lists we by no means open. Donate the books we aren’t going to complete. And say no to individuals who drain our time, happiness, sources, and religion in humanity. ( those I’m speaking about.)
So many people are in search of happiness as a result of we don’t know what it appears like. We are saying sure to the whole lot and solely get pleasure from a few of it. We confuse ourselves about what’s a “f*ck ya!” and a “f*ck no.” It’s all simply “meh, I suppose so.”
We are going to by no means discover solutions dwelling a “meh” life.
3. Cease Half-Assing Every part and Begin Complete-Assing One Factor.
There are lots of people who know somewhat about a whole lot of issues, however not many who know rather a lot about a number of issues.
We put a half-assed effort right into a bunch of programs or books and by no means actually implement the content material in these programs.
Final 12 months, I carried out the “would I learn this three instances?” technique and located it immensely highly effective.
The rationale this works so effectively is as a result of most individuals purchase books they don’t even plan on studying as soon as, by no means thoughts 3 times. It forces us to actually selected one thing, to be intentional, and to decide to one thing deeply.
Discover a ebook you need to learn and decide to studying it a number of instances. Take notes, spotlight it, implement one among its methods for every week, after which see how this shifts your understanding of the core rules inside the ebook.
We are able to use this idea in so many areas of our lives—courting, for instance:
We swipe left and proper so quick now we hardly see an individual’s face. As an alternative, think about that swiping proper meant you needed to go on three dates with this individual. We’d be rather more intentional, wouldn’t we?
So select what you need to whole-ass. Select, deliberately, what you need to decide to after which dive in like a navy seal.
So have action-based religion, say no, whole-ass the issues that carry you pleasure, and earlier than you recognize it, you’ll have the solutions you’ve been in search of for years.
**This put up was initially revealed on Elephant Journal**
An Open Letter to Seekers
Connor Beaton is the founding father of ManTalks, a world group targeted on males’s well being, wellness, success, and success. Earlier than founding ManTalks, Connor labored with Apple, main high-performance gross sales and operations groups. Since founding ManTalks, Connor has spoken on stage at TEDx, with Lewis Howes, Gary Vaynerchuk, Danielle LaPorte, taken ManTalks to over a dozen cities internationally and has been featured on platforms like Forbes, Huffington Submit, HeForShe, The Good Males Challenge, UN Ladies, CBC, and the Nationwide Submit. Meet up with Connor on his web site.

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